


Natasha Gets All The Hot Guys (Except The One That’s Literally Hot)

by JaneyKatherineHummingbird



Category: Fantastic Four (Movies 2005-2007), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Barbershop Quartet, Multi, Polyamory, TaserTorch, background Sam x Steve x Nat x Bucky, i ignore canon after Civil War, nats matchmaking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-12 07:27:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29631150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneyKatherineHummingbird/pseuds/JaneyKatherineHummingbird
Summary: Darcy thinks it’s unfair that Nat’s claimed all the hot guys. Nat decides to find her one of her own. Turns out, he is hot in both the literal and metaphorical sense.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Johnny Storm
Comments: 3
Kudos: 37





	Natasha Gets All The Hot Guys (Except The One That’s Literally Hot)

“Really, Natasha? You’ve added Bucky to your harem now? Why do you have to hog all the hot guys?”

Darcy griped at Black Widow as she sat across from her at the large dining table, plopping her fork down with a disgruntled air. The brand new poly four had just told the other avengers about their status and Thor had told Darcy, whose fan girl hopes and dreams were now crushed. 

“It’s not a harem, Darcy, but thank you for the mental image,” Natasha replied calmly, adding a smug wink. “Besides: you snooze, you lose.” 

They both watched as Bucky sauntered over and joined Nat, his plate groaning under the mountain of food. 

“What’s with the long face, Darce?” He asked, going to town on his steak. The blissful expression on his face made her smile in spite of herself. 

“I’m just bitter that Nat keeps snapping up all the hot dudes. Leave some for us science types. We need love too, ya know.” 

She made a pouty face at him and he chuckled.

“Sorry, doll,” he said sympathetically. “We all kind of lost touch with the rest of you and things kind of…..fell into place. Heard you’ve been busy getting your PhD. Probably didn’t leave you much time for finding a man.”

Darcy smiled. 

“Yeah, that’s true,” she admitted. “But I really am happy for you all. Steve looks ridiculously happy and it’s adorable. And you and Sam flirting in the gym? Hilarious.”

She rubbed her hands together gleefully.

Bucky raised his eyebrows.

“You been spying, Darce? I’ve never seen you in the gym.”

Darcy grinned evilly.

“I will not reveal my sources.” 

Bucky gave her an exasperated look, but he was smiling. 

“You always were a little shit, Lewis. Seems that nothing has changed.” 

“Nope!” she declared cheerfully. “Someone’s gotta keep you heroes on your toes. I’m grateful they invited me to this shindig. The food is top notch.”

It was basically a glorified reunion and celebration over the abolishment of the Accords. In the beginning, they’d seemed like a good idea to some of them, but after the bitter fall out of their fights and the subsequent reality of just how problematic the Accords actually were, well, no one wanted anything to do with them. Darcy had never trusted anyone named Ross and wasn’t about to start now. 

She pushed her empty plate away from her with a satisfied sigh.

“Well, I’m gonna go bother Captain Spangles for a few minutes. Enjoy your red meat.”

Getting up from the table, she sauntered over to Steve who was chatting happily with Sam, Scott, and Wanda. 

Bucky returned to his meal with relish, only stopping when he’d demolished everything on his plate. Nat had scooted her chair closer to his and was leaning against him contentedly, caressing his metal arm. 

“You know, James, I’m thinking I know of a “hot guy” that would be an interesting match for Darcy.” 

“Do you now?” Bucky asked, smirking at the idea of Nat matchmaking again. Her skill set made her very good at finding potential dates for other people and he’d learned to just roll with it. 

“Yep. He was pretty insufferable and immature back in the day, but the last time I worked with him, he seemed to have grown up a lot. He would give Darcy a run for her money, I believe.”

“Do I know him?” Bucky asked curiously, wracking his brain.

“You know him as Flame Boy,” she told him, grinning at Bucky’s expression as he understood who she meant. They’d met the Fantastic Four briefly and Clint’s old nickname for Johnny had stuck, much to the man’s displeasure. 

“Oh man,” he chuckled. “This is gonna be good.” 

Two weeks later, Darcy was hiding from yet another alien invasion and being frustrated that her taser did not affect the creatures. 

“Please tell me you’re sending help!” She yelled into her phone to Clint.

“We are, but it’s not who you might expect. Stark had to call in extra help, because these things are multiplying really fast.”

“Just tell me who it is!” She snapped impatiently, braining an alien lizard thing with a brick. The creatures weren’t all that bright, but there were a LOT of them. 

“The Human Torch, aka Flame Boy, is gonna zoom by in a minute and take you to to the tower.”

“Human Torch? What kind of dumb name is that?” Darcy scoffed. Clint had already hung up, so she returned to her attempts to not get eaten. Another five lizard things surrounded her and she almost groaned in despair. Just as she had resigned herself to being lizard chow, a car screeched to a stop and a ball of fire flew overhead and right at the creatures, bombarding them with flames and sending them screeching away, howling in pain. She gaped in awe as the ball of fire landed a few yards away and revealed itself as a man wearing a tight fireproof suit. As the flames died away, she stared in shock at the smiling face of Johnny Storm himself. 

“Dr. Lewis?” he asked. “I’m here with your ride.”

He gestured towards a very shiny bright yellow Lamborghini and Darcy felt a touch faint. 

“You’re the Human Torch?” she asked cautiously. 

“Yep.” He confirmed, with a nod and smile that reminded her a lot of Steve Rogers. “I’d suggest we get out of here before more of those things show up. Like my chariot?”

“It’s pretty sweet, I admit,” Darcy said as he unlocked the doors and opened hers for her.

“Ohh. A gentleman.” She said teasingly. “Didn’t know you had it in you, Mr. Serial Seducer.”   
She had heard tales of Johnny’s bedroom exploits, but had never heard his superhero moniker. It definitely made sense, now. 

Johnny’s face turned red, but he took the jibe in stride. 

“Occasionally, I have my moments,” he said, giving her a smirk as he started the car and got them the heck out of there. 

“So, Astrophysics?” He asked her as he took a shortcut down a side street to avoid a blocked off street chocked with lizard things. Thy looked a lot like the Gorns from Star Trek, Darcy thought with a shudder.

“Yes.” She nodded proudly. “I’m surprised you knew that.”

“A certain distant cousin of mine thinks of you very highly and made sure I was properly briefed,” Johnny said. “There may have been threats of bodily harm if I said something inappropriate.”

Darcy leaned her head back and laughed until her sides ached. Well known playboy Johnny was related to straight laced Steve Rogers? The universe sure did have a sense of humor. She imagined Steve threatening Johnny and wheezed as tears of mirth streamed down her cheeks. 

“Well, I can very much see the family resemblance,” she giggled. “Looks only, though. Oh, my gosh, this is the best.” 

“I’m glad you think so.” Johnny said with a reluctant chuckle. His annoyance at yet another comparison to Rogers was dampened by how adorable her laugh was. He thought he could listen to that for hours. 

“Steve said you’d taze me in the balls if I said something gross.”

“He was right, bless him,” Darcy said, appreciating Steve even more. “But seriously, that flame ball was awesome.”

“It comes in handy sometimes,” Johnny said with surprising modesty. Darcy looked him over again and wondered if the years had toned him down from the egotistical kid he’d once been. It was a good look on him, she thought. 

“Steve failed to mention just how pretty you are,” Johnny said after a few beats of silence. “Does the man have eyes?”

“He does, but only for a certain fly boy and two deadly assassins,” Darcy said, laughing and blushing a bit at the compliment. 

Johnny’s eyebrows flew up.

“Wow, Cap’s got game! But he must care about his friends, too or he wouldn’t get so protective over you.”

“He’s a good dude,” Darcy agreed, as the car pulled into the tower parking area. Security was tight, but Darcy flashed her ID and soon they were parking. 

Johnny got out and once again opened the door for her.

“Well, hopefully we’ll run into each other again,” he said, trying to sound casual. Darcy got the sense he was very interested, but reining himself in. It was rather cute. 

“Maybe we will, Preferably when there’s no lizard aliens trying to eat us,” she replied. “Stark’s got a big charity gala coming up and I may be there.”

He broke out in a grin and nodded.

“Good to know. Stay safe, Doctor. I’m gonna go scorch some more lizards.”

“Don’t get dead, flame boy!” She called over her shoulder as she turned away. Surprisingly, Darcy looked forward to getting to know what made Johnny Storm tick. Maybe her luck had finally changed. If he turned out to be a keeper, she was not gonna let Nat snatch him up, no sireee.


End file.
